National Infertility Month

My best friend asked me to write about all the CRAZY crap I have seen in Texas so far. However, I feel I have to touch this subject. So... if one more person gives me advice, tells me I won't understand until, or offers their condolences... well, I might just snap! I have the world's best husband, honestly-wouldn't still be walking upright like a human if he wasn't my backbone! However, with all the support in the world, infertility is the devil. I see crack whores get pregnant and have babies. Yeah, the babies probably have long-term problems, but do you know what I wouldn't give to have a BABY? No matter what the problems? I am quite frustrated tonight. Not sure why... I love children. My nieces and nephew are awesome. My friends have awesome kids. I even love kids I have worked with (whether through gymnastics or Japanese students), but tonight I am insanely frustrated. I want a baby. I want a baby with MY husband. No surrogate. Just the two of us. I hate that we can't have that. People tell me "at least you can travel." FUCK YOU! What I wouldn't give to have a baby. I would give my left arm AND leg... you have no idea what this feels like. I try not to be jealous or envious of my friends and family when they share their good news. I don't want to be Debbie Downer. I just want people to be more respectful. Don't bitch about your blessings. Realize that morning sickness is something I would cherish. Heartburn is something I would be ecstatic about. Some little kicking the shit out of my ribs would be the most cherished thing in the world to me. So stop bitching. You have something that so many women DREAM about and can't have. So SHUT UP and enjoy every waking pain that comes your way! If you have a healthy baby, count your blessing and say a prayer for those of us that can't. And with that, I will get off my soapbox and quit with my pity party.